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tales of interest you guys box with numbers in inflammation the panda won't stop screaming backwards backwards frontwards frontwards
basically, i would like to be killed please - Thanks, ants.
Thants.
annlarimer
annlarimer
basically, i would like to be killed please
So last night, I was gonna get dinner and buy groceries. No big thing.
First I get my prescription refill. Then I walk to the burger place and order dinner. I put my backpack down on a table, and notice that the bottom is damp. So is the back of my shirt, where the pack rested against it. I must've put it in something wet, I think. Maybe they'd just wiped the counter at the drug store.
Then I notice it smells kinda like vanilla hand sanitizer.
Then I pull out the clipboard with the printout of the story I'm beta-ing, and OH DEAR GOD I have just found out what happened to the pot of yogurt I thought I'd forgotten to pack that morning. Dinner goes cold while I try to get it off my hands and the ms and rescue my books.
I can no longer use my backpack, which is kind of a big deal in a town where public transport shuts down at 6:30.
I explain to a staff person that I need to leave my stuff there while I go up the block and get a 99-cent eco-bag from the drug store.
The drug store no longer has 99-cent eco-bags. "We gave them to charity last week."
"Do you have any tote bags at all?"
"They'd be right here if we did." There is nothing there.
"Well, balls." I am pretty sure I don't say this out loud.
I end up with a hideous Hallmark giant gift bag and hustle back down the hill.
I shift my stuff into the bag, finish my food, and walk to the grocery store. The staff keep subtly glancing into the giant gift bag (now in my cart) to make sure I'm not shoplifting hams. I am not, in fact, shoplifting hams. I don't get home until 9:00.
There are probably things more unpleasant that scooping lukewarm yogurt and detritus out of a backpack with your bare hand, but I don't really want to experience them.
I shove the backpack into the washing machine. I don't think that the leather straps or brass findings or the cardboard that shapes the bottom panel really enjoyed it much. But now it smells like Arm and Hammer Free instead of rancid vanilla dairy.
I really hope I get through the manuscript quickly. It's kinda stiff.

ETA:
Excerpt from a Google chat.
me: I had a tub of vanilla yogurt come open in my bag.
cybertardis: Ew ew ew. That's like having...OH GOD NO
me: Yes. Yes, it is. Yes.
cybertardis: *holds you*

Tags: , , ,
mood: tired tired

Flavogg heard 9 supplications or speak to the Mighty Flavogg
Comments
day221b From: day221b Date: May 17th, 2012 05:24 pm (UTC) (linkage)
I'm so sorry, m'dear. I hope this day goes much better. :(
annlarimer From: annlarimer Date: May 17th, 2012 07:13 pm (UTC) (linkage)
I saw three priests in full uniform! They had sashes and everything!
nitasee From: nitasee Date: May 17th, 2012 06:42 pm (UTC) (linkage)
That tops having an entire glass of sweet raspberry tea dumped in my purse. (It was an accident, the perp swears.) It could be worse. I could be vanilla yogurt that had sat in the backpack for several days in 90+ temperatures.
annlarimer From: annlarimer Date: May 17th, 2012 07:15 pm (UTC) (linkage)
I can imagine. I once spent Labor Day in a car with Susan after her blueberry soda florshed open all over it.

Moral: Blueberry soda is not a good breakfast choice, even if it only comes from one drive-in in upstate New York.
hawkmoth From: hawkmoth Date: May 17th, 2012 11:11 pm (UTC) (linkage)
Oh Lord, and now I feel horribly guilty.

As to the Great Yogurt Disaster, last night I had to clean up a bottle of Elmer's Glue that had spilled across the computer table.
twigcollins From: twigcollins Date: May 18th, 2012 03:01 am (UTC) (linkage)
I lost my last bag to a frozen blueberry-vanilla strudel roll (serves 12) that I'd forgotten about overnight and had become remarkably less frozen and more... inflated.

And squishy.

So I do feel your pain.
tikistitch From: tikistitch Date: May 19th, 2012 07:37 pm (UTC) (linkage)
The last time I had something happen like this - I went to the movies, and put down my purse.

In gum.

I can't even stand the sight of discarded gum in real life. Seriously. I have to change seats on the bus if I spot a wad o' gum.

Of course, I didn't get Gum from Hell mixed with fic. THANK LOKI FOR SMALL FAVORS. That is what your story has taught me.
goddessdster From: goddessdster Date: May 24th, 2012 03:07 pm (UTC) (linkage)
I would be more grossed out by this, except I had to clean out 2 post-Katrina refrigerators and bury the contents. My parents' garden grows the best tomatoes now.

Of course, there's nothing that smells worse to me than rancid milk, so, my sympathies.

Also, the back of your shirt, oh god.
annlarimer From: annlarimer Date: June 6th, 2012 03:35 pm (UTC) (linkage)
BRB screaming forever.
Flavogg heard 9 supplications or speak to the Mighty Flavogg