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tales of interest you guys box with numbers in inflammation the panda won't stop screaming backwards backwards frontwards frontwards
fic post: 'REPLY ALL Y/N?' (hot fuzz) - Thanks, ants.
Thants.
annlarimer
annlarimer
fic post: 'REPLY ALL Y/N?' (hot fuzz)
TITLE: REPLY ALL Y/N?
AUTHORS: annlarimer and rosencrantz (crantz to you)
FANDOM: Hot Fuzz
SUMMARY: Danny fails at boudoir photography
WORD COUNT: 770 it says here
RATING: PG
WARNINGS: American spelling
DISCLAIMER: Hot Fuzz belongs to the boys and girls at Rogue and Big Talk and their friends.



REPLY ALL Y/N?
By Phosfate and Rosencrantz

1.33 p.m. GMT

DButterman: sent u a pic nick. picnic!

ACartwright: Learn to use your fucking phone.

1.34 p.m. GMT

Angel777: I enjoyed our evening last night, Danny, and am examining your photograph with great interest



DButterman: lol u suck at talking sexy. more where that came from. came!

DButterman: andy delete that that was for the next an down okay?

1.35 p.m. GMT

Angel777: Was that Wainwright screaming out there?

DButterman: andy stubbed his toe or sumthin

Angel777: Yes. Well. I'll see you tonight, then.

AWainwright: OH GOD BLIND NOW and next an down what the fuck are you talking about?

DButterman: got a sticky scroll wheel ball thing on phone it goes andy andy then angel i got beer on it

ACartwright: I actually understood that.

DogWalker: The fuck is this? The fuck?

DButterman: then doris

1.38.p.m. GMT

SpiderFisher: I appreciate your interest, Danny, but I am very happily married.

WPCThatcher: Thank you for the package, Danny. XD

ACartwright: What about Bob?

DButterman: bobs not until s

1.39.p.m. GMT

ACartwright: Bob starts with a B you pillock.

DButterman: saxonanbob starts with s

ACartwright: AUTORESPONSE: ANDREW CARTWRIGHT IS UNAVAILABLE

DButterman: i can see u at the coffee maker u cunt

ACartwright: AUTORESPONSE: ANDREW CARTWRIGHT IS UNAVAILABLE

3.17 p.m. GMT

DButterman: i piked out movie 4 us 2nite

ACartwright: Oh christ what do you deviants watch?

Angel777: Sounds perfect!

DButterman: sorry again andy. die hard 4.

3.19 p.m. GMT

ACartwright: Oh.

ACartwright: Well. Enjoy it then.

ACartwright: I FUCKING HATE BUTTERMAN SO MUCH.

DButterman: that went 2 me andy

ACartwright: Oh. Sorry, Biggun. :)

3.23 p.m. GMT

DButterman: okay tonight I'm a down on my luck stripper and youre a plumber?

WPCThatcher: I'll get my plunger then, shall I?

DButterman: sorry doris that was for angsomebody else ill try again

WPCThatcher: [FORWARDED MESSAGE ATTACHED] I think this is for you, Andys. ;)

AWainwright: STFU DORIS!

ACartwright: JESUS FUCK, DANNY

DButterman: sorry!

ACartwright: AUTORESPONSE: ANDREW CARTWRIGHT IS UNAVAILABLE

3.28.p.m. GMT

Angel777: Why does Andy keep screaming?

DButterman: hes out of fags

ACartwright: AUTORESPONSE: ANDREW CARTWRIGHT IS UNAVAILABLE

Angel777: Well tell him to go down to the shop so we can have some peace. Examining your photograph again. I find it extremely interesting.

DButterman: heeeeeeeeee!

3.32 p.m. GMT

Angel777: I look forward to discussing it this evening.

DButterman: i bet u do big boy 2nite i am teh barbrian warrior & u r my wizard

AWainwright: FOR FUCKS SAKE, BUTTERS! Have some fucking self respect!

Angel777: Big boy? :D

DButterman: aw man need pens so bad

ACartwright: AUTORESPONSE: ANDREW CARTWRIGHT IS UNAVAILABLE

3.37 p.m. GMT

WPCThatcher: How do you misspell penis so badly?

ACartwright: AUTORESPONSE: ANDREW CARTWRIGHT IS UNAVAILABLE

DButterman: pens! we need 2 order a box.

lonesomefrank: you make me cry son

DButterman: wait what?

3.41 p.m. GMT

lonesomefrank: you tramp angel!

DButterman: dad!!! hi!!!

Angel777: Mr Butterman, possession of a cellular device while incarcerated is a violation of the law

DButterman: he is not a tramp!

AWainwright: This is some real capulet and montague shit here hi frank.

ACartwright: Hi Frank he's a complete tramp.

DogWalker: Hi Frank. Tramp.

WPCThatcher: Hi love!

3.43 p.m. GMT

SpiderFisher: What? Frank? Is that you?

Angel777: STOP HITTING REPLY ALL, DANNY!

DButterman: sorry dad u had 2 know sometime

AWainwright: What song?

3.45 p.m. GMT

DButterman: they did a song at the end bfor eve an mr blower got axheaded.

AWainwright: Evey and Blower did a song?

DButterman: but i want 2 make sure u get the whole message

WPCThatcher: If he doesn't, he's bloody thick.

3.50 p.m. GMT

SpiderFisher: Wait. I think Sgt Butterman and Inspector angel may be carrying on!

Angel777: THAT IS NOT WHAT REPLY ALL MEANS

AWainwright: Well spotted, Fisher.

ACartwright: Good job Tony.

DogWalker: poofs

WPCThatcher: Do you really think so, Tony? :D

3.55 p.m. GMT

lonesomefrank: AUTORESPONSE FROM VIRGIN MOBILE: THIS NUMBER IS NO LONGER IN SERVICE

DButterman: Oh.

DButterman: Sorry everybody.

3.57 p.m. GMT

Angel777: You should have hit reply all that time actually

DButterman: Nicholas make up ur mind

AWainwright: Yeah, front door or back door!

ACartwright: Good one!

DButterman: Sorry everybody.

4.01 p.m. GMT

Angel777: You got it right that time! I will reward you properly tonight.

ACartwright: JESUS CHRIST ANGLE NOW YOURE DOING IT

4.10 p.m. GMT

Angel777: All right. I want everyone in my office for a refresher on text messaging protocol.

lonesomefrank: AUTORESPONSE FROM VIRGIN MOBILE: THIS NUMBER IS NO LONGER IN SERVICE

ACartwright: AUTORESPONSE: ANDREW CARTWRIGHT IS UNAVAILABLE

4.12 p.m. GMT

Angel777: NOW.

lonesomefrank: AUTORESPONSE FROM VIRGIN MOBILE: THIS NUMBER IS NO LONGER IN SERVICE

ACartwright: AUTORESPONSE: ANDREW CARTWRIGHT IS UNAVAILABLE

Tags: , , ,
mood: chipper chipper

Flavogg heard 11 supplications or speak to the Mighty Flavogg
Comments
karli_meaghan From: karli_meaghan Date: August 10th, 2012 09:38 pm (UTC) (linkage)
Lol, that was awesome. I especially loved Tony's "Wait. I think Sgt Butterman and Inspector angel may be carrying on!" That is so very Tony of him. Have you thought of posting a link to this on sandfordpolice? I'm sure they'd love it. (PS: found this through your Tumblr post, I have "hot fuzz" as a tracked tag)
annlarimer From: annlarimer Date: August 10th, 2012 09:39 pm (UTC) (linkage)
Thank you very much! Yes, it's in the SP queue. Waiting to hear how badly I cocked up the post. As it were.
goddessdster From: goddessdster Date: August 10th, 2012 09:52 pm (UTC) (linkage)
This is some real capulet and montague shit here hi frank.

I ...can't

That was hilarious. I hate putting that. It's like making a statement instead of showing the response. It feels false. Contrived. I wish I could record myself laughing, and then show you my face because it's been too long since a good laugh was surprised out of me, and then post it in some way that wouldn't creep either of you out.

...


That was hilarious.
annlarimer From: annlarimer Date: August 10th, 2012 09:55 pm (UTC) (linkage)
LOVE.

We were both in Des Moines last month. I don't think we can be further creeped out.
day221b From: day221b Date: August 10th, 2012 10:08 pm (UTC) (linkage)
I love it. Oh, boyz! (all of them.) So much love!
thistlethorn From: thistlethorn Date: August 10th, 2012 10:35 pm (UTC) (linkage)
I echo the "it was hilarious" trend--and I've only seen the movie 1.5 times, so it takes me awhile (and/or IMDb) to remember who all the characters are.

As always, amazing job. You crack me the fuck up.
tawg From: tawg Date: August 10th, 2012 11:55 pm (UTC) (linkage)
I hurt myself laughing at this, and instarecced it on twitter. I loved Danny explaining why Bob was down under 'S', and Nick being crap at dirty talk, and the repeated punchline of AUTORESPONSE: ANDREW CARTWRIGHT IS UNAVAILABLE. This has been an awesome fic to eat breakfast to :D
wolfy_writing From: wolfy_writing Date: August 12th, 2012 12:17 am (UTC) (linkage)
This totally cracked me up.
inthe_parlance From: inthe_parlance Date: August 14th, 2012 12:25 am (UTC) (linkage)
I laughed till tears came! Thanks so much!
dr_tectonic From: dr_tectonic Date: August 15th, 2012 03:25 am (UTC) (linkage)
Likebutton!
random_nexus From: random_nexus Date: February 11th, 2013 04:41 am (UTC) (linkage)
OMFG! I am giggling my arse off! YES! Oh, I loved this wacky thing to bits!
Y'all are brilliant geniuses of fic!
Flavogg heard 11 supplications or speak to the Mighty Flavogg